Wednesday, January 31, 2007
what to do?
what to do? what should i do? express.. don't suppress.. GODDDDDDDDD................. its all up to You now.
heartbreak..
i feel useless.. i feel like a failure. God help me. Lead me in what i do. every single decision i make doesn't bear fruit. i thought i was doing right but i was not. i thought i'm good but i am not. i am crushed. i don't know. i don't like this. what is happening to me? help. its painful. i thought i was generous. but i realized today that i am selfish. i am soo selfish. serve me right. what was i thinking? deliver me o God. i had negative thoughts in me.. i know its wrong.
Monday, January 29, 2007
Purrrrrfect end...
730 am
Jumped out of bed. Send my dear to work. zoooooom! straight to uni.
900 am
I sat down at the foyer, switch on my laptop and here goes... *type*type*type*scribble*scribble*scribble*tap tap tap on calculator buttons* Ahhhhhhhhh.. how come not balanced?????? Balance sheet, profit and loss statement, cash flow statements flying everywhere...
200 pm
i'm hungry. no time. ran down to cafeteria. grab 2 sandwiches. swallowed them. back to work.
215 pm
still hungry. ahhhhhhhhhhhh... i asked my friend to call the emergency hotline. McDonalds.
300 pm
My burger came, and i swallowed it. back to work.. Really thank God for Michelle and Hasyim who were helping me all along with this assignment. but then, still lots more to go.
500 pm
Oh no! already 5! stil lots more. i can do it i can do it!!
545 pm
messaged my dear, saying that i couldnt make it to pick her up from work. Ahhhhhh! i felt so bad. Horrible horrible.. She's understanding and she just said its ok. I am super duperly tired. lucky i'm a Christian. If not i will curse all the way.
600 pm
my dear messaged me that Kar wai couldnt send her home.. she got no transport home. Poor thing. I got some tips from michelle and i packed up my things and will finish it later.. Off i go to rescue my baby
615 pm
J.A.M
630 pm
J.A.M
645 pm
Traffic jammed again. ahhhhhhh.... WHY OH!
700 pm
i dont feel like talking to anyone. just my dear. and she called and was so sweet & caring.. woo hooo...
710 pm
Finally reached minlon. ahhh.. picked her up and she gave me a hug.. *melted*
800 pm
after sending her home, i went to church for worship practice. Then i borrowed my car to my friend for emergency use. Luckily i am not on duty this week. if not *pengsan* i was just there trying to finish my work. AHHHHHHH! still cant balance! Then the practice was not good. had a good round of "counselling" from ZH.
1110 pm
ahhh.. i think i'll just do it at home.. tired... but.. where's my car? its supposed to be here at 1030. OH NO~~~ called my friend.. couldnt get him. *&^%##%^ ahhhh.. okok cannot cannot...
finally i found out that he is still in pudu. something popped up.
1200 pm
Really really not happy. got back my car and rushed straight home. oh wait. i forgot to take the charger from church office! ahhhhh! Greg might need it. oh no... i'm already in bukit jalil. WAIT! i forgot to fetch my another friend! ahhhhh... all the way back to church.. then to Cheras and back to bukit jalil. My stomach is growling like a hungry wolf.
115 pm
Called my dear.. ask her whether i need to bring the charger for Greg or not. She asked me to come.. i got changed into more comfortable clothes, grabbed the soggy pack of biscuit and off i go!
130 pm
Reached my dears house. She opened the door with the warmest smile that i have ever seen, and asked me.. "have you eaten dear?" nope.. "help me, help me!" my stomach yells. "I have cooked for you..." Wow.. never felt so happy b4. i ate the tastiest indo mee in my life and also drank the nicest iced milo that i have ever had. i got a back massage from my baby too. wow... sweetest moment of my life... *melted*
Jumped out of bed. Send my dear to work. zoooooom! straight to uni.
900 am
I sat down at the foyer, switch on my laptop and here goes... *type*type*type*scribble*scribble*scribble*tap tap tap on calculator buttons* Ahhhhhhhhh.. how come not balanced?????? Balance sheet, profit and loss statement, cash flow statements flying everywhere...
200 pm
i'm hungry. no time. ran down to cafeteria. grab 2 sandwiches. swallowed them. back to work.
215 pm
still hungry. ahhhhhhhhhhhh... i asked my friend to call the emergency hotline. McDonalds.
300 pm
My burger came, and i swallowed it. back to work.. Really thank God for Michelle and Hasyim who were helping me all along with this assignment. but then, still lots more to go.
500 pm
Oh no! already 5! stil lots more. i can do it i can do it!!
545 pm
messaged my dear, saying that i couldnt make it to pick her up from work. Ahhhhhh! i felt so bad. Horrible horrible.. She's understanding and she just said its ok. I am super duperly tired. lucky i'm a Christian. If not i will curse all the way.
600 pm
my dear messaged me that Kar wai couldnt send her home.. she got no transport home. Poor thing. I got some tips from michelle and i packed up my things and will finish it later.. Off i go to rescue my baby
615 pm
J.A.M
630 pm
J.A.M
645 pm
Traffic jammed again. ahhhhhhh.... WHY OH!
700 pm
i dont feel like talking to anyone. just my dear. and she called and was so sweet & caring.. woo hooo...
710 pm
Finally reached minlon. ahhh.. picked her up and she gave me a hug.. *melted*
800 pm
after sending her home, i went to church for worship practice. Then i borrowed my car to my friend for emergency use. Luckily i am not on duty this week. if not *pengsan* i was just there trying to finish my work. AHHHHHHH! still cant balance! Then the practice was not good. had a good round of "counselling" from ZH.
1110 pm
ahhh.. i think i'll just do it at home.. tired... but.. where's my car? its supposed to be here at 1030. OH NO~~~ called my friend.. couldnt get him. *&^%##%^ ahhhh.. okok cannot cannot...
finally i found out that he is still in pudu. something popped up.
1200 pm
Really really not happy. got back my car and rushed straight home. oh wait. i forgot to take the charger from church office! ahhhhh! Greg might need it. oh no... i'm already in bukit jalil. WAIT! i forgot to fetch my another friend! ahhhhh... all the way back to church.. then to Cheras and back to bukit jalil. My stomach is growling like a hungry wolf.
115 pm
Called my dear.. ask her whether i need to bring the charger for Greg or not. She asked me to come.. i got changed into more comfortable clothes, grabbed the soggy pack of biscuit and off i go!
130 pm
Reached my dears house. She opened the door with the warmest smile that i have ever seen, and asked me.. "have you eaten dear?" nope.. "help me, help me!" my stomach yells. "I have cooked for you..." Wow.. never felt so happy b4. i ate the tastiest indo mee in my life and also drank the nicest iced milo that i have ever had. i got a back massage from my baby too. wow... sweetest moment of my life... *melted*
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